Expect More

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers-

Happy Thursday!  Today is a great day filled with love, joy and an abundance of happiness.  It didn’t start that way, it started with plenty of headaches and bad attitudes and people just jumping for the chance to get on my nerves, but things have changed in a short period of time and for that I am grateful.

I was talking to the Lord this morning, and I came to the understanding that in order to live a rich life – I have to expect more.  I have to expect more for myself, for those I love and for the projects that occupy my time.

When we have no expectation, we usually experience no sense of change.  I believe that if we raise our expectations, we’ll stop settling for anything less than God’s best for our lives.

I believe in raising expectations- those who are meant to be in our lives, will rise to the occassion and fulfill those expectations of better.  Those who should be removed from our lives, will lag behind and drop off since they do not want to come up in life.  Expect more… from your relationships, from yourself/personal goals and from those you serve in ministry with.  Expect more!  

Expect change and change will come.  Expect love and love will come.  Expect respect and respect will come.  Expect more!

Until next time,

Mo 🙂

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Dear Future Husband

Dear Future Husband, 

I’m not one to make a lot of empty promises, not one to say things I hope you’ll want to hear.  I just want to be real, especially with you.

You see- I see you as my God-given gift.  I am your rib, your helpmate, the one destined for you.  So I value my role and position in your life, I was built to cultivate your greatness – to make your deepest dreams come alive.  I was fashioned after my mother Eve, wrapped in her beauty- detailed in her love and with the wisdom of Deborah and the grace of Ruth, I stand in the strength of Rahab, ready to stand by your side.

I promise to be myself and to accept you for who you truly are.  I promise to point you to the Father, knowing that true love comes from Him and Him alone.  I promise to hear your fears and not jump to conclusions/judgments.  I I promise to rejoice when you rejoice and to cry tears of sadness when your heart is broken.  I promise to fill your days with laughter and your nights with dancing. I promise to be a  listening ear and a mouth ready to defend your character. I promise loyalty, I promise faithfulness, I promise truth – all of the core things promised by our Lord Jesus Christ.  I promise to allow you to lead, even as God-ordained; while retaining my God-given spirit of independence and strong will.  I promise to love those you love dearly and to accept your family as my own.  I promise to never give up. because once I am in- I’m all in for the long run.  I promise to be a shoulder to lean on, a confidante, a voice of reason and a godly representation of Christ’s love for us.  I promise to be who God designed me to be for you: and nothing less.  I promise to be vulnerable, I promise to let you in – even when it’s hard and all I want to do is run and hide.  I promise to allow you to love me even when I don’t think I am deserving of such love.

Perfect love casts out all fear, so with you- I plan to be fearless!  I plan to be released from all inhibitions – with you, I plan to be alive.  I promise life and the joys that come with  truly living.  I’ll always love you.  My love may evolve, but it’ll remain constant- always being for you and you alone.  I promise all these things, as precious as my next breath- I love you.

Now and forever,

Your- soon- to-be-wife 

©Simone Holloway, 2015

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No Longer In The Trenches

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers-

Happy Memorial Day!  This title came to me in prayer this afternoon.  I was praying concerning a situation, and what came to my spirit was “No longer in the trenches.” I believe that some of us have been going through some serious warfare, whether it’s warfare on our jobs or in our homes or etc.  This warfare has gotten so intense, that we hopped back into the trenches to take cover and regain strength to fight again.  There’s nothing wrong with spending a moment in the trenches, but after awhile we have to get back out there and fight for what God has promised us.

The Enemy, through our return to the trenches- He begins to think that we are weak, that we are retreating and He runs havoc in our lives.  He uses anything to break us down and He smothers us in our problems, thinking that if we lack hope- we’ll give up and throw in the towel .  But I don’t know about you, but I’ve been in this war with God for too long to just give up.  I’ve been doing this for too long, not to win!

I believe that today, in the irony of this holiday, the Holy Spirit quicken my spirit to get out of the trenches and to return to war.  He empowered me to war for my family, to war for my friends, to war for my better half.  He empowered me to war, because in Christ Jesus – those who war, win!  I encourage you to get out of the trenches and to return to the battlefield; armed in prayer, the word and the power of the Holy Spirit.  You will win, as you place your trust in Him!

So stand with me as a fellow believer, determined to be no longer in the trenches. God bless and Happy Memorial Day!

Until next time,

Mo 🙂

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I’m So Busy….Doing What????

Hello Authentic Lovers!

I’m just getting a moment to breathe, working overtime to complete some task before Memorial weekend dawns upon us and I am feeling tired and slightly aggravated.  I was thinking a moment ago, why am I so busy?  And, am I busy doing something meaningful?  When you’re busy doing something purposeful, it’s like you find the motivation to continue in spite of being tired or stressed or etc.  But the real question for myself was, why am I so busy? And is what I am investing my time into, actually worth it?

I’m reminded of the story of Mary and Martha.  Jesus was coming into the town of Bethany and decided to stop my His friends; Mary,  Martha and Lazarus’ place.  Three siblings that shared this common bond of friendship with Jesus Christ.  Martha being ( I would assume) one of the older siblings, took it upon herself to prepare for Jesus’ arrival.  She prepared a meal and she served all of the guests that stopped by the house, she cleaned, she was so busy making sure everything was perfect for Him.  Mary on the other hand, as soon as Jesus came by, spent time in His presence and just sat at His feet- eating up His every word.  She was still but she was busy too, busy feeding her soul.  Martha looking at Mary’s stillness became very frustrated with her sister, because she thought her sister should have stopped everything to help her- knowing how busy she was….  I like the next part of the story, because it simply says that Jesus looked at Martha and told her that she was busy doing things that held no eternal meaning, but that Mary was doing what was meaningful in that moment.

Today I feel like Martha, busy doing things that aren’t meaningful.  I love my job, I do.  But is it meaningful?  I love  those I serve with, but is the work we’re doing meaningful?  I love the kids I teach during the week, but is it meaningful?  I rather be like Mary still and feeding my soul- than to be like Martha, do the most when it isn’t necessary.  I believe that when we live life in purpose, all of the trials of life become worth it.  We find ourselves satisfied in where we are.  We find contentment in purpose.  So this evening, I implore you to examine your life and how you are living it?  Are you busy?  If so, busy doing what?  Is what you are doing meaningful?

Have a great evening and we’ll talk soon!

Until next time,

Mo 🙂

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Initials

I saw your initials and instantly my lips turned into a smile…

Mhmmm... I miss you, haven’t seen you in a while

Two distinct letters caused my tinted cheeks to redden

Here I am,  a black girl blushin’…at the thought of you.

was asked today if I was reentering the dating scene

nah, all I wanna do is lean… into you.

Don’t wanna play with anyone’s heart

Don’t wanna start

something with someone that I’ll have to finish 

this love for you, I can’t seem to diminish

no matter how hard I try

*sigh*

tongue-tied

I lied

when I said you had no effect on me

thinking that at the sight of you I could just be

truly okay

your lingering presence, I just want to stay

Hmmmmm…I saw your initials today.

©Simone Holloway, 2015

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I Am Coming

The time is nigh, the hour is near.

So do not be afraid,  do not be filled with fear.

I am on My way, I’m approaching the earth.

I see the misery,  I behold the dearth.

I see the pain, and hear the children’s cries.

I know those who are telling the truth,  among those telling lies.

I see the molestations, by those carrying My name.

Yes, I know the hypocrites- I understand their game.

Evil has grown rampant, justice is declining.

Where’s hope says My people? Where’s the silver lining?

Hope is in this simple fact, one that is true.

I am coming,  I am on My way to you.

So do not fret children or Israel, do not fret my lovely flock.

Everything is going to be okay,  your future in My hands- I’ve locked.

©Simone Holloway, 2015

Featured Image Credit: http://world-outreach.com/blessed-hope/

He Think He Slick…

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers-

Hey y’all!  Today has been a great day, filled with peace and relaxation, but today as I was checking out the profiles of some of the those that follow me on Tumblr- I became upset by one of the pages I saw.  This person’s page looked like it was a Christian page, with a scripture here or there- but the images that came up were explicit perverse images.  I was HEATED  because as someone who was delivered from perversion, I hate it when I am surprised by perverse things.  I choose not to watch explicit scenes, I choose not to use bad language, I’ve changed and therefore I don’t invite perversion into my atmosphere or into my life.  As an individual on the road of purity; in my mind, actions and soul- I go to extremes to maintain my lifestyle in pursuit of pleasing God with my life.  SO I WAS HIGHLY HEATED…when my eyes saw some things that it shouldn’t have, HIGHLY HEATED….

But I think, I was more upset that this person pretended to be something that they weren’t.  They had this facade of purity but their blog didn’t reflect the mask that they wore.  I hate it when people pretend.  If you are dealing with perverse thoughts and you like to have sex and watch porn- then just admit it!  Don’t lie about it and pretend to be something that isn’t true.  I rather someone flat out tell me that they are bound to sin than to lie to me and that they aren’t.  That’s just me. When I was struggling with porn- I came out and told the truth and this honesty produced freedom in my life.

But you know what the Enemy think he slick… that after I ran into my accidental discovery that I was going to revert back to my past lifestyle.  That I was going to yearn and desire pornography.  That I was going to voluntarily make my bed in hell, but he’s stupid because I’m NEVER going back!!!! NEVER!!!!

I’ve made up in my mind that I was no longer living in a mindset of sneaking around, doing things that I wasn’t supposed to do because of some temporary thrill of pleasure.  A pleasure that left me empty, guilty and seeking to end my life.  I’m NEVER going back and right now y’all I am so mad at the enemy, I can’t stand his guts.

You know fam, he comes to steal, kill and destroy.  He comes to trick you back in to bondage and to throw away the key, but I am so happy that greater is He that is in me, than he that is in the world.  God is greater, He is bigger, He is more powerful than sin and the Enemy.  HE IS!!! 

Well…. I guess my rant is over, thought I would share my raw thoughts with you and I wanted to encourage you to be real.  I don’t care if you believe in God or if you don’t. I don’t care if you know “Christian” language or if you don’t.  I don’t care if you are church-ed or unchurch-ed.  All I care about is your authenticity, the realness of your soul.  So if you say you are a person of faith, be a person of faith.  If you say you love God, then love God. If say you live for Him, then live for Him.

Don’t pretend. Don’t make things up.  Don’t lie.  Be real!

Until next time,

Mo 🙂

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Doppelgänger

I saw someone who had your smile,

frankly it scared the living daylights

out of me.

free..is what I thought I was

from you.

removed from your grip  on my heart

yet again, my heart reacts to this twin

fraudulent look alike; as if its you.

who knew?

that a smile would gather such

a reaction.

a gut-wrenching

reaction. that still

takes a toll on me.

I lied….

I’m not over you .

In fact- I love you more.

©Simone Holloway,  2015

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I Will Wait

Here is a poem by one of my favorite poets: Janette…Ikz called “I will wait for you”.  When I heard this piece, I caught myself relating to every lyric and understanding exactly what the poet was saying.  It was like Janette..Ikz wrote this piece for me.  So take a minute to dive in to one of my favorite pieces and enjoy!

Until next time,

Mo 🙂

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Yahweh Jireh: The God Who Is Consistently Providing

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers

Good Afternoon!  Thought I would take a spare moment to reflect on the goodness of the Lord.  Every now and again, something will happen in my life that would exemplify God’s love towards me.  Whether it is something big or small, these gestures of love- make me reflect on who God is and His amazing works.

Ever so often, we need a moment of gratitude.  A period in the day when we are reminded of the goodness of Yahweh.  I don’t know about you but I have needs, so many needs.  My needs need needs…. (sorry if that gets confusing).  I am consistently bombarded with things that I need to do or need to have in order to progress in my livelihood.  I am reminded of the Apostle Paul who spoke, “whether I have a lot or whether I have little- I have learned to be content.”  I too, have learned to be content; but as things get tight in my life, I sense light frustration on the horizon.

One of my favorite passages of scripture is when Abraham was commanded by the LORD to offer his only son, Isaac as a sacrifice.  Abraham loved Isaac and God promised that through Isaac, Abraham would become the father of many nations.  So why would God ask Abraham of the one thing that he  needed to make this promise true?  Why would God ask Abraham to kill his promise?  I pondered these questions, as I began to see what was promised to me seem to disappear before my eyes.  Why would God give me something and then ask me to sacrifice it?  Hmm… Why?

Abraham in obedience, prepared to offer his son (promise) as a sacrifice to the Lord- and before he completed the action, an angel pointed him to a ram in the bush to substitute his child’s place on the altar.  Abraham named that place, Jehovah Jireh- The God who provides.  I believe that even now, out of obedience as I place my dreams and ambitions on the altar (my promises), Yahweh Jireh shows up and he provides what I need instead.

He is consistently providing.  From rides to work, to meals to eat the next day, to the money I need for my bills.  He is consistently providing.  In the nick of time, He releases what we need and when we think all hope is lost, He reminds us of  His power and mercy.

He shall supply all of my needs, according to His riches and glory in Christ Jesus.  He is the Lord my shepherd, I shall not lack.  He is my all and all.  He is my best friend- He is always looking out for me.  I’ve witnessed his provision- and today, you can too!

Just trust and believe.

Until next time,

Mo 🙂

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