The darkness comes each time, each year;

During what’s supposed to be the season of wonder and cheer.

Like a thief in the night, the sadness steals pieces of priceless joy.

It reminds me of terrible memories, involving a terrible boy.

I thought I escaped this tradition; I thought by now this would end.

Until one day, at my desk, the tear-fest began.

My inner critic scolded me, it cried in disbelief.

“Simone, you should be happy. At least you’re free!”

“You’re right.” I replied, “What in the world am I doing?”

I was better off without him, I was not the one losing.

Yet our phantom soul ties are bullies and make us believe otherwise.

These little monsters mask the truth in loneliness, fear and lies.

Memories will advocate on the behalf of what’s relationally dead;

And before you know it, you’re sad when there is so much more ahead.

So, my dear friends, these are some words I speak to you;

Keep your heart open to wisdom and you will find them to be true.

Don’t mourn that which is not worthy; do not cry over spilled milk.

Lovely, do not waste time giving attention to things of a toxic ilk.

Be vocal and be honest, about the condition of your heart;

Utilize your community, welcome them into the process – let them be apart.

For you were created for a bright future, you was made to be loved well.

Send every lie and guilty feeling straight to the pits of hell!




This morning, I felt the sadness coming and I said not today.

I rather be alone than place my relational future in disarray.

©Simone Holloway, 2019

Things We Learn From Movies….

Hello old friends, new followers, and fellow bloggers-

Have you ever watched a movie, invested in it and then at the end was left disappointed? Literally, my life ten minutes ago.  I checked out a new film, invested two hours and fifteen minutes into the film, but by the time I got to the end I was like “OMG ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME?” It was as I was #AvengersInfinityWar’d all over again!  But, Ladies and Gents- that feeling of disappointment matches some of the relationships I chose.  I entered into these relationships:  excited, intrigued and overwhelmed with the hype of who their representative swore to be but by the time I got to the root of the substance that lied within the individual, I was quickly disappointed.  It’s nothing worse than wasting time, especially in people.  How many of us were attracted or intrigued by an individual and when push came to shove, was ultimately disappointed by what we invested into?  This is something, I’ve experienced and I these are the thoughts I would like to share with you.

So…why are we attracted to the shallow and insufficient?  Why do we jump all the way into things without testing the weightiness of it?  I think all of my experiences were rooted in fear.  Fear of being alone.  Fear of not connecting with someone in the same way.  Fear that nothing better will come along.  The crazy thing about fear is that it will have us dancing on the line of desperation, in an effort to control what’s next.  I think that we jump too soon because we’re scared that we’re going to miss out because of time.  Time like sand slips through our fingers and we feel this anxious clock hovering over us telling us who we should be by a certain year. I ran into relationships because of these fears and I was disappointed because I invested in something without counting the costs. I made decisions out of my fears and I was disappointed.  However, the Father promises that if we place our trust in Him, we will never be disappointed.  God choices do not disappoint.  Choices construed out of myself, feelings, and fears are going to disappoint me every single time.

What I love about God is that He doesn’t get mad at us if we choose wrong, but instead He reveals to us what we need so that we can choose right.  He does not disappoint us, we disappoint ourselves!  So… let us move forward and let us make the God-choice where it concerns relationships!  Let us choose what He desires and we won’t find ourselves disappointed.

“… those who hope in me will not be disappointed.” Isaiah 49:23



FIC: http://www.patrickbetdavid.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/10/movies-red.jpg

I Desire To Forget

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers –

Today’s devotional was about forgiveness and I thought I would share my deepest desire with you.  I desire to forgive in such a magnitude that I don’t remember the sins of those that wronged me. Many say forgive but never forget, however I don’t want to remember.  I don’t want to have a memory that attaches someone/some place from my past to a particular feeling.  I want to be able to see that person and harbor no resentment/bitterness in my heart toward them.  I want to be able to see that person and not worry about them hurting me again, because I now lack the knowledge of them hurting me before. I want to be able to step into a building and not react with feelings of insecurity because of the sins that were committed in that place.  I believe that operating in true forgiveness allows me to do just that, without this guilt of “I’m being dumb or naïve.”  I strive to walk in a forgiveness that forgets the wrongs of those that sinned against me.

1 Corinthians 13: 5 says that “Love remembers no wrongs…” it does not harbor past transgressions against no one.  Love does not remember past sins and faults.  This love and forgiveness is demonstrated to us through love of Jesus Christ.  He died for us, loving us in spite of our mistakes and faults and loving us into a personal transformation.  He forgave our faults and He does not harbor them against us any longer. His love is real and His forgiveness is sure.  I being His servant/ambassador/friend, walk even as He has walked and choose to not remember the sins of those that done things to me in the past.  I choose not to remember, no to hold someone to a memory of who they once was….

***NEWSFLASH*** People change!  That’s right, you heard it here first folks!  People change.  Some change for the better, others change for the worse- but all in all change is evident and consistently in effect.  Change is inevitable. So if I hold my brother or sister to a fault that occurred in their past self, against them in the present time- where change may have occurred- I am not being fair.  I am not being just.  Because God is just, He does not hold our past sins to us but acknowledge the possibility of change.

Should we do the same? Are we being truly just? Or are we living life constantly being unfair?

Today, I encourage you to forgive.  I encourage you to let things go and to choose to not remember.

Why harbor bad memories?  Why hold sadness in your heart? To learn a lesson?  The lesson has been learned and applied, so isn’t it time to find happiness again?  Isn’t it time for reconciliation? Isn’t it time to be free to have happy memories again?  Isn’t it time to forget completely?  Isn’t it?

The choice is yours on how you live your life.  Whether you are happy or living in sadness- the choice is yours.  I choose to be happy.  I choose to love like Christ loves.  I choose to completely forgive.  I choose to forget!

Until next time,

Mo 🙂

Featured Image Credit: http://thevillagechurch.net/mediafiles/uploaded/b/0e2360063_1375834511_blog-forgiving-despite-forgetting.jpg

Tis’ The Morning To Be Tested

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers- 

I think that life is filled with surprises, some big and some small; some good and some bad but overall, it’s filled with surprises.  I feel like I’ve been tested since the moment I woke up.  I woke up with a headache and not feeling well.  I didn’t really want to go to work but pressed my way to be here, on time.  Then when I get to work, no none is in the office leaving me standing outside in the freezing rain.  Since I don’t have a key, I’m feeling slightly irritated and annoyed so much so I’m thinking about sacrificing a day’s worth of pay just to go home and sleep.

A las. tis’ the morning to be tested….

So by mid-morning, my attitude is atrocious- I’m frustrated  and I just want to go home.

I think God has a way of testing us in certain areas to see how we react to circumstances that we can’t control.  Today was one of those days in the form of one of those tests.  I could (a.) get rude and lose my job, (b) control my attitude and think positive thoughts , or (c.) allow the way I feel, dictate my actions.

So… I decided to think positive thoughts and to extend mercy and grace in times of testing.  WE HAVE THE CHOICE TO TURN OUR DAY AROUND. 

Pray my strength!

Until next time,

Mo 🙂

Featured Image Credit : https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/0b/b2/f5/0bb2f5e8a30d70460c38898f1fbf69c9.jpg

A Wrong Choice

Hello Authentic Lovers-

How are you guys doing?  Today has been an interesting day so far, from getting lost in the court buildings to missing a hearing, to starting off my day with a little Trip Lee “Manolo” action, and the day just started.   Anyways…I was reading Mark 15 this morning, like early in the morning ( 3ish?) and I was thinking about the reaction of the people as Jesus stood before Pilate.  I know it’s Christmas and some will say I should be focusing my study on Christ coming into the world, and “save all that” cross stuff for Easter, but hey the cross is always appropriate no matter the time of year.

Why is it always easier to choose the wrong thing?  To choose the wrong person? To choose the wrong lifestyle?  Why?

I thought about the power of wrong choices as I read this chapter this morning.  Jesus was arrested the night before and the He was before Pilate. Pilate was the governor of the land at the time was honoring a tradition of releasing a prisoner before Passover.  The public had a choice: Jesus (charged with claiming to be God) or Barabbas(a known murderer and criminal). Jesus, mockingly called the “King of the Jews”, had done nothing wrong and was arrested illegally( at night).  SO I’M ALL ABOUT JUSTICE…so if I was in the crowd I would have chosen Barabbas, but I would have been the minority.

The crowd yelled at the top of their lungs,,,,”WE WANT BARABBAS..” Pilate clearly nor understanding the animosity of the crowd asked, “What shall I do with him (gesturing to Jesus)? ” The crowd sealing His fate, yelled once more – “CRUCIFY HIM!”  

The crowd chose a murderer over an innocent man.  Isn’t that the times we are coming into, when the majority are choosing things/people that are not good for them, and therefore destroying what is good.  Jesus’ death was necessary for the salvation of mankind, but what are the deaths of those who are innocent doing for humanity?  How is their death significant, especially if it causes more violence instead of peace?  Why do we choose hatred over love? Violence over peace?  Selfishness over selflessness? 

Why do we make wrong choices?  Maybe it’s because at the beginning of time: Adam and Eve made a single wrong choice and ate the forbidden fruit, dooming mankind.

Now it was the custom at the festival to release a prisoner whom the people requested. A man called Barabbas was in prison with the insurrectionists who had committed murder in the uprising.  The crowd came up and asked Pilate to do for them what he usually did.

“Do you want me to release to you the king of the Jews?” asked Pilate,knowing it was out of self-interest that the chief priests had handed Jesus over to him. But the chief priests stirred up the crowd to have Pilate release Barabbas instead.  “What shall I do, then, with the one you call the king of the Jews?” Pilate asked them.

 “Crucify him!” they shouted.

“Why? What crime has he committed?” asked Pilate.

But they shouted all the louder, “Crucify him!”

 Wanting to satisfy the crowd, Pilate released Barabbas to them. He had Jesus flogged, and handed him over to be crucified. ( Mk 15:6-15 NIV)

Until next time,

Mo 🙂

Featured Image Credit: http://gbcdecatur.org/files/Barabbas.jpg

I Chose…

Hello Authentic Lovers!

Just a little while ago I posted a poem called, “I Just Don’t Know”, to express my angst at making a decision to love someone from my past .  I think we have all found ourselves at these crossroads, deciding whether to trust again.  After I posted the poem, I took some time to talk to God.  I spoke to Him about my feelings and concerns. I told Him that I didn’t want to be stupid, I didn’t want to open my heart again to someone that messed up the first time.  I brought my grievances before God and articulated every hurtful thing this individual has ever done to me in the last 3-4 years.  I was so serious about reminding God of what this individual had done.  In the midst of my rant/cry fest, the Holy Spirit spoke to me:

“Love remembers no wrong…” (I Cor 13: 5 paraphrased)

I allowed those words to sink into my heart, I felt like such a hypocrite.  I have asked God for forgiveness for so many things and He has gracefully forgiven me.  He has forgotten my wrongs and He does not bring them up to remind me of the awful person I used to be.  God has forgotten my past, why can’t I do the same for this person?  The same way God made me new is the same way He can make this person new.  He is not a respect of persons, He doesn’t play favorites.  The Word of God, shocked me like an electric current and caused me to think about my actions.  God’s word has that effect on people.  I thought about what God said and I decided that I was going to forgive (completely) and forget.

Today I made a choice.  I chose to forgive.  I chose to let go.  I chose to see people the way God sees them.  I chose to love again, even if it’s the same person.  I chose to be happy.  I chose to forget the past or what people may think.  I chose to live my life, taking risks knowing that with great risk comes great reward.  I’ve made my choice and I chose to love because love remembers no wrongs. 

I love y’all. Follow me on Twitter @framesofdust8, Instagram @mynameis_mo578 and like my Facebook page @ http://www.facebook.com/authenticlove789.  I hope to talk to you guys soon!

Until next time,

Mo 🙂

Featured Image Credit : http://lindsaykriger.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/forgive1.png

I Just Don’t Know

I used to have all the answers

About how I felt about you

But, now I’m speechless…

I just don’t know

I used to be so clear

Clear about you

But, now no words come….

I feel stuck in the middle

Of speech and silence

Of happiness and anger

Of certainty and doubt

I just don’t know

To hear that you dream of me

The same way I dream of you

To hear that you think of me

As much as I think of you

To hear that I’m in your heart

The same way you’re in mine

My mouth is vacuum-sealed shut

Afraid that if I open my mouth

Things will change

You’ll decide otherwise

Because for the first time in my life

I have to decide whether it’s right

To love you again

To keep you at arm’s length

To allow between us more distance

And to tell you the truth

I’m no longer confident

That if I follow my heart

It won’t lead me astray

My gut failed me before

When it gambled on you

So now what?

What should I do?

I just don’t know….

“(c) Simone Holloway, 2014”

Featured Image Credit :http://i.imgur.com/BHSyEot.png

Actions Cause Reactions ( A Conclusion)

Hello Authentic Lovers

Today is the last day in the Adam & Eve series. I hope everyone had a great Sunday… I thought I would end this series with a friendly reminder- a reminder of basic physics: actions cause reactions. What we do has some type of consequence, sometimes good and sometimes bad.  The lesson that is learned from this power couple is that their single action of disobedience caused the downfall of mankind…generations of people after them. Think about it! The consequence for Adam’s disobedience was the hard labor he would experience in tilling the ground for food. What once freely gave him life, would only give life after hard work. Eve would experience pain in giving birth- women all over the world hate Eve. Lol. Finally immortality would not be experienced any longer… man being created from the Earth would die and return back to the Earth.  Death was the ultimate consequence-man would forever be separated from God. One action caused a major damaging reaction.

This is why I encourage each and every one of you to think about your choices.  Think before you do because your choices not only affect you but also those who are in your life.  Think before you do.  Sometimes it’s hard to make sound decisions and it’s hard to not do things on impulse but wisdom causes an individual to be conscience of their decisions.

Think before you do!

Until next time,
Mo 🙂

Featured Image Credit: http://a.wattpad.com/cover/2522823-256-k0b18d02e.jpg


We were together


Walking life’s beaten road

We were together

With time as sand 

It was Us against the World

On this path we walked

Day and night

We discovered life on the way

On this path

We sought

In love we wanted to stay

But we came to a fork in the road

                                                    I went left                                                  You went right

                                                  I became day                                              You became night

Decisions had been made

I thought we would be together


On this road

 We called life

But, decisions were made

Some not necessarily right

So I say

What should have been said

Things that others wouldn’t dare

But our choices are ours alone

They make us stop and stare

At what we have


What should be

The worst decision

Ever made

Was thinking you could live life

Without me

“(c) Simone Holloway, 2014”

Featured Image Credit :http://jackeybackman.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/09/fork-in-the-road.jpg

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I Fell…

I fell in love

But no one caught me

On the pavement

I hit my face

I took a risk

But no one gambled

Remembering moments

I wish I could erase

I gave my heart

Held nothing back

Eager to forget

My past

I was ready

To create a future

That wouldn’t last

I’ve done the love thing

So many times

Time and time again

I’ve learned the ropes

Of this heart game

I know the rules my friend

And while it may be dumb

Or a stupid choice

I choose to fall once more

But this time I’ll fall

Only for the guy

Ready to see

What’s in store

(c) Simone Holloway 2014

Featured Image Credit:http://www.impactlab.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/10/falling-in-love.jpg