Holiday Anxiety

Hello old friends, new followers, and fellow bloggers- 

Happy pre-holiday season, with Thanksgiving approaching in the next few days, some of you may be feeling the what I describe as “holiday anxiety.”  It’s this dreading feeling that comes when you know you have to be surrounded by family and answer a bunch of aggravating questions.  As a newly single walking embodiment of awesomeness, I hate all of the aggravating questions that come with being seated at the family dinner table.  I don’t know about you all, but I feel like we live in a world where we are always asked to supply answers to questions that we simply don’t have the answer to.  For example, “How long will you be single?”; “When are you going to have some kids?”; “Girl, why you ain’t got a boyfriend?; “Girl, when are you getting married?”  In my heart I want to scream, “I DON’T KNOW, DO I LOOK LIKE GOD?”  but on the outside, I smile gracefully and say, “I don’t know.  I’ll let you know when I find out.”  I’m not going to let them know… I’m going to make all my announcements after the fact on social media.  My family will find out about my life choices when the world finds out. Trifling?  Yeah, I know.

Ladies and Gents, If you’re like me, I feel your pain and I understand your holiday anxiety.  But more so, I sense the temptation to return to my past due to my own loneliness.  It’s like Lord, you separated me from what I was in before but because of my own desires to be held and to be in a relationship, I feel tempted to return back to that which you’ve set me free from.  I believe that many of you are facing the same temptation, the temptation to return back to your past. This overwhelming temptation to settle for what you’ve been freed from out of convenience and loneliness.  This, I believe is the reason many of us have found ourselves at a crossroads:  Do we return to what the Lord asked us to leave?  Or, do we wait for what He promised?  I had a choice, return back to my ex so I can finally have an “answer” pleasing to men or to wait for what the Lord promised which is better!

Anyways, I can’t tell you all how to live your life.  All I’ll say is do not forfeit your future for the temporary conveniences of today.  So, here I go approaching this awkward time with boldness and depth reminding myself of the truth: I’m happy, I’m content,  and I’m waiting and that my dears will have to be enough.

Xoxo,

Simone 

FIC: http://www.b2beck.com/images/holiday_anxiety.jpg

Where Do We Find Meaning?

Dear old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers

Happy Monday!  I hope you all are doing well and that you’re not deflating under the  Monday Blues.

Anyways, I believe that we live in a world where people crave for something meaningful.  We desire for our lives, relationships, careers to hold meaning and to reflect some type of value within our society.  Think about it, would you choose your job if that position held no meaning within society: whether that is power, prestige, honor, etc.  What about your perfect guy or girl?  Do the characteristics they possess hold any weight within our value system? Even think of the homes we reside in, are the aesthetics one of “esteem” held within our society fixated on beauty and volume.  What if for a moment, we found meaning in just being the person we were created to be?  Marrying the spouse duly suited for our life and love goals?  Living in the home that we perceive to be best for us?  Working the career that we are passionate about and that changes a majority of lives?

Isn’t that meaningful?

Society teaches us that meaning is in our possession, accomplishments, and assets.  God, however, teaches us that meaning is within Him and as we find ourselves within who He is, we automatically hold meaning, value, and worth within society.  This value and meaning hold regardless of our looks, career, education, home aesthetics, and relationships.  Our lives are meaningful because we are meaningful, just as we are.

Until next time,

Simone

📷 FIC : https://tvo.org/archive-programs/maps-of-meaning

 

Cuffing Season

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers- 

So I was reading the Skimm, which is by the way is AMAZEBALLS… anyways, I was reading my daily dose of brief and concise news when I saw a line stating that it was cuffing season.  I was like, “what the heck is that?” If you guys do not  know what I am talking about, “cuffing season” is what most people call Fall because it is the time people hook up, get into relationships so that they can survive the cold weather with a snuggle buddy.  No lie, this is like a common practice.  I’ve seen more relationship posts, complaints of singleness and “ride or die” memes in the last 3 weeks than I have in a long time… I even found myself thinking about my relationship status and then was like, “Girl, GET YOURSELF TOGETHER!”  I’m too much of a BOSS to sulk about not having a “man” in my life.

Can you imagine a grown woman giving herself a pep talk, with full dialogue?  Jesus take the wheel, but sometimes you have to encourage your own self in the Lord. So my lovely family and friends, I bet there are some of you out there questioning God, like “When is it going to be my turn?”  Trust me friends, I bet that is one question God hears a lot.  I can imagine the Father in heaven anticipating those words throughout the day.  I know I’ve been guilty of uttering those words, “When am I going to meet my one and only?”  Friends, I even tried to make people fit that description in my life.  It never goes well, you cannot make someone fit into a God-ordained position not created for them.  And I’m worried that some of you, caught in the hype of this relationship focused season , are gonna find yourselves cuffing with the wrong person- creating soul ties with those who mean you no good.  You can’t force someone to love you, and you can’t force someone to step up and be who you need in a partner.  Wait on God.  Yeah, yeah I know those words are super cliche and that sometimes these are the words that cause anger to build quickly- but, please I beg you : Wait on Him!

Trust me, when you wait on God – things work out better!  When you try to do it yourself, things go wrong quickly and painfully.  I saw a meme on Insta the other day that made me laugh so hard.  It was a side by side of Beyonce in her VMA  dress  and another dude in a dress that was a hot mess trying to match Yonce’s slay with the caption “When you wait on God and when you try to do it yourself.”  I laughed so hard, it was so funny because that was one of the most accurate memes I’d seen in a while.  When we try to do things ourselves, we mess ourselves all the way up- but when we wait on God, He gives us the best and make His promises reflect beauty in our lives.  I’m not cuffed to anyone and to tell you the truth I don’t want to be.  I rather freely love than be bound and hooked to the wrong person.  I want to journey life with someone and not have to worry about them being faithful, or worry about them respecting me as an individual.  I don’t want to compete for their attention or try to make them care about me deeply.  I’ve been there, I’ve done that.  I’ve played the game and I lost miserably, because I operated out of myself and I did not wait on God.  So I know first hand from experience, it is better to wait on God than to try to create things for yourself. Wait on Him!!!

Ladies, watch who you cuff with and be careful who you choose to be your snuggle buddy! Like my momma/grandma use to say, “If you lay down with dogs, you’ll get up with fleas…” *sips tea* Be careful, darlings, be careful because you only need to give your heart to the wrong person one time, and it can mess you up for a long time.  So from one sister to another, watch and pray less you fall into temptation….

Anyways, love yourself.  Be confident.  Be content. Stay at ease.  Your time will come soon and when it does you’ll forget these moments you felt alone.  I love you guys so much and I’m praying for y’all.  We’re going to get through this together!!!! 🙂

Until next time,

Simone

BTWs: Start a hobby, get involved in your community, go out and have fun.  Boaz is not in your house, he’s out and about – go to the grocery store, you may meet him there. lol. Love y’all ❤

FIC:http://www.hercampus.com/sites/default/files/styles/full_width_embed/public/2014/10/13/cuffing-season-103013.jpg?itok=JWqExRj2

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Nothing Else Matters

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers –

This is an early blog post from my usual stuff but I have something that is burning on the inside of my heart.  I think it is so easy to get caught up in things that have no power over our lives, things that relatively do not matter.  I’ve heard this before- life is trivial, it’ll eventually come to an end and all that we cared so deeply about will fade away.  Thinking of what was to come used to terrify me especially since I barely had a true grasp on the life I’m living now.  But then something hit me…. The only two things that matter are: (1) Is God real? (2) If so, is He coming back for us someday? 

We live in a world that points no to the above questions.  Think about it- if God is real, how come we have suffering?  If God is true, how come he has not come back for his children yet?  To hold on to one’s faith in the midst of today’s chaotic atmosphere is the true test of victory and many have fallen under the hand of disbelief mixed with fatigue.  I woke up around 4:30 AM pondering these questions.  As I fell to sleep, I believe that in the next few minutes – the Lord began to speak to me.  We get so caught up in questions like, do they like me?  Will I ever succeed?  Will I ever make my parents happy? How will my life pan out?  but at the end of the day- these things mean nothing if God is not real and He is not coming back.   Our hope in our future is that we have a God that understands exactly what is coming and can lead and direct us toward our greatest potential.

Life outside of Him, does not matter.  I closed my eyes and I dreamed an evening in my life; church, fellowship with my bestie but there was a twist – this was the night the Lord decided to come for me (His child) and as I dreamed my spirit ascending to meet Him in the clouds- I was at such peace  because God is real and He is coming back.  Peace overcame me as truth was manifested in my midst and everything else faded to the background.  It’s time we live our lives as if God is real and as if He is coming back, and it is when we approach life with this mindset that we will see true change among us.

The children of God has gotten lazy; too lazy to care about the poor here in our neighborhoods, too lazy to love those who need love the most, too lazy to care about the homeless in our cities- we are too lazy for the revival we profess to desire.  We pray for the harvest, yet we do not want to till the ground and prepare the land for rain.  This has come from not finding our true answer to the questions above: Is God real? and If so, Is He coming back for his children?  When we come to the place where we can truthfully answer these questions- we will see the change/ revival we seek.

I believe that God is real and that He is coming back for me.  One day, when I’m living life as I usually do – He will be in the clouds, waiting to welcome me home.  It is this hope that drowns out all of the bad around me, that makes the fear fade away.  Nothing else matters, because the One who matters the most is with me – guiding me in life to bring me to that fateful day.  It is with this hope that I live this life with abandon and that I give my all to the Lord until my last breath.  Friends, fade in the hope that is in Him and be at peace.

Grace and Peace be unto from God our Father and our Lord Jesus Christ. (Phil 1:2)

Until next time,

Simone

 

Questions

Poetry inspired by the hearts of others…

1.What defines a relationship?
A  friendship stemming  from loyalty.
2. Do you understand me?
I'm honestly seeking an answer for our foundation.
3. What about our lack of communication?
It's frustrating to experience life with you.
4. One + One = Two...but are you sure?
because I feel like One + One = One
5. How could your heart I have won?
When you're not even sharing that with me.
6. Who do you expect me to be?
In the longevity of your life.
7. Is it side chick or wife?
Since you placed me to the side to seat your ego.
8. You know?
I don't want to be someone's second priority.
9. Do you even want to choose between your ego and me?
Let's see....
©Simone Holloway, 2015

Featured Image Credit: http://images.bwbx.io/cms/2013-03-18/0318_sb_readerQuestions_630x420.jpg

Triggers

Triggers.  Those things that bring you back to that dark place, you swore you’ll never return.  Triggers. The thing about them is that you can take control over them or your can let them control you.  Life is full of reminders of disappointment, pain, fears and etc.  But what do you do with these things?  Triggers used to take me to a depressive state, setting me up for a lifestyle of sin. Every time I fell into the sin of porn or any other sin, there was a trigger that created the pathway.  That trigger could have been stress, anxiety, worry, depression, or just a plain feeling of being overwhelmed,  Either way, there was a trigger.  I sense a trigger of stress and anxiety trying to rear it’s ugly head tonight- telling me that God didn’t care about my needs nor was He concerned with what I was going through.  I had a choice to fall into the power of those triggers or to overcome them.  Good thing, I had a good friend present who wouldn’t let me leave her car without praying with me  She prayed and eased my mind of those tiny triggers, those things that come to trip us up and make us fall.  So tonight, I ask you- what are your triggers?  Do you have power over them or do they have power over you?

Until next time,

Mo 🙂

“Resist the Devil and he will flee from you…” James 4: 7

Featured Image Credit: http://superslimmerben.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/Triggers-597×429.jpg

Thanks!

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers –

I just wanted to take a moment to say: THANK YOU!!! I really appreciate the love you guys give me by reading these posts and just being there for me. There’s alot coming up on the blog and I am super excited about sharing my heart with each and every one of you.  If you have any questions or you just want to chat, feel free to email me at authenticlove789@gmail.com.  Follow me on twitter at @framesofdust8 and like the blog’s Facebook page at http://www.facebook.com/authenticlove789.  I look forward to chatting with each and everyone of you and I hope today is the best!

Until next time,

Mo 🙂