No Shame

Hello old friends, new followers, and fellow bloggers- 

Happy Friday!  Have you ever been so full of clarity that you’ve sat and thought about life?  Maybe it’s just me:  but after I have a moment with God, sometimes I just sit in my room in silence and ponder what I just experienced.  Last night was one of those nights. I was recovering from experiencing a sermon by the GOAT Dr. Matthew Stevenson III, and I just happened to be wired at 1:45 in the morning.  I was up UP.  Anyways, I sat and heard this song by TenthAvenueNorth called “No Shame.”  and my life was changed forever.  I found the theme song for my season/life.  There is a freedom that comes with living and expressing truth, free of shame.

During my time in Greenville, each day God has been pulling back layers of fear- asking me to confront my heart issues and removing all kinds of weight including the weight of shame.  When you’re in this place of vulnerability, it’s easy to think man, what will “so and so think” but that doesn’t matter. God has taught me that the fearless live in truth and where there is the truth, there is no need to be ashamed.  I’ve lived bound under the realm of shame for so long, not sharing my truth- not addressing things with others, belittling my call or purpose, but now that shame has been dissipated with perfect love I’m good.  I turned the song all the way up and began to sing to the top of my lungs.  Before you knew it I was dancing in my kitchen celebrating freedom.

Where there is grace, there is no shame and where there is love, there is no fear.

Y’all, I have no idea what this life of no shame will bring but I’m excited.  I feel free, like in the depths of my soul.  I feel like I can conquer the world.  I feel strong and full of life in the inner chambers of my heart.  I feel brave.  It takes bravery to move into the unknown out of fear into love, out of being guarded to being open, out of holding things into being extremely honest.  I am okay with where I am and that is freedom all in itself.  I’ve embraced the truth about me and I am unashamed.  I’ve embraced my triumphs and my failures, every ounce of my brokenness and the places where I am whole, all of my strengths and all of my weaknesses.  I’m okay with every ounce of me and I am enough because I am in Him.  I’m literally smiling as I type this article, overjoyed at the process He is doing in my heart.

I am happy with my process.  I rejoice at my journey.  I’m content with my story.

Family, this is what a life of no shame looks like: it’s singing and dancing at 2 o’clock in the morning with no fear, with no shame.  It’s trusting for provision when it seems like all hope is lost.  It’s being unfazed with bad news because you know in your soul that He’s working all things for good.  It’s loving others beyond their capacity to love you.  It’s forgiving even when you don’t want to.  It’s having hard conversations, dealing with the hard relational issues, and making hard decisions for your next.  It’s going beyond opinions of others, beyond even your opinion of yourself, feeling fear but doing it anyway.  It’s riding the tallest rollercoaster, swimming in the deepest oceans, and taking road trips on faith. It’s relocating because God said to, and finding that you have a home waiting for you.  It’s being light, weight free and full because those that place their trust in Him will never be put to shame.  Trust not only eradicates fear but for me it eradicated shame. 

I’m living with no shame! 

Xoxo,

Simone

P.S. Check out TenthAvenueNorth’s song “No Shame”.  It’s available on all streaming platforms!

FIC: https://i.pinimg.com/originals/c7/a6/3c/c7a63c0f9aa1e312f6b51a8ac19d15fb.jpg

Getting Through…

Hello old friends, new followers, and fellow bloggers

Wowzers… What I can I say?  2L year is officially over and it seemed like yesterday, I was prepping for the move to law school.  I remember feeling anxious but incredibly excited that I was getting the chance to pursue my dream.  Fast forward and my dream almost killed me:  from the competitive environment to the failure to meet my own expectations to the self-doubt that clouded my mind questioning if I could really be who God created me to be.  Could I do this?  I mean, really do this?  This wasn’t my favorite movie, Legally Blond, neither was it my all-time TV show NCIS but this was real life.  There was not Annalise Keating, no Law and Order and no JAG, this was real, scary, and seemed to be impossible.  The joy that awaited me once I entered the program quickly disappeared and I found myself hoping each day just to “get through.”  If only I could get through the day, then I can get through the week, hopefully, the month, semester, and year.  What do you do when you’re in your dream, but you hate it?  I woke up each day dreading what was in front of me, for I knew that I was up against all manners of evils.  I faced the evils of comparison, anxiety, fear, diminished self-worth and the worst evil of all: the lack of motivation, drive, and ambition towards my dream.  I wanted to be a lawyer so that I could help people, but I didn’t know that my desire to change the world was going to cost me so much.  Who knew that to accomplish something so great, one would have to experience so much pain?  I had no idea that this school year was going to be one that extended me beyond my breaking point.  It was this school year that I thought about giving up and changing careers.  I literally walked into the Dean’s office and made plans to withdraw from school.  It was this year that I discovered who my real friends were because during shaky times, it was those I placed trust within that betrayed me.  It was this year, I came face to face with my own insecurities and fears and just when I thought I was going to lose it all, the grace of the Father came and rescued me time and time again.  This is not just some ordinary, she got through the year hooray post but rather a post celebrating the fact that I survived a year designed to kill me.  This year was designed to kill my joy, my trust, my faith, it was designed to cause me to lose hope and to leave God behind.  Yet, here I am: stronger than ever!  Though this was one of the hardest school years, it was the best because it taught me more about God and myself.  I discovered the depth of my strengths and embraced the vulnerability of my weaknesses.  This was the year I got through!

I don’t know what you’re facing, and have no idea the level of pain you’re experiencing but if I can encourage you with anything, God has the power to bring you through whatever you are in.  I promise you, speaking from personal experience that even when you don’t have the strength to keep going, God will give you the strength to keep moving forward.  Trust me, I thought I was going to be a law-school dropout but instead, I’m entering my last year moving one step closer to my goal.  Keep moving, cry if you must, be angry, feel and watch God carry you through even this.  Once you get to the other side, you cease to remember the pain it took to get there.

Xoxo,

Simone

Featured Image Credit: Joyce Meyers Ministries (https://www.joycemeyer.org/-/media/joycemeyer/everyday-answers/teachings/3×1/getting_through_hard_times_3x1_sd.jpg?h=240&w=720&la=en&hash=20FB683C48AA6FF3A6DACA5BCF58055A7E3478A1)

 

Was It Worth It?

Hello old friends, new followers, and fellow bloggers- 

Good evening.  Tonight’s post was hard to write, for it forced me to face another level of vulnerability within myself.  Transparency makes me slightly uncomfortable but I’ve resolved that to live the life the Father has created for me, I must be transparent.  I don’t know if it’s been noticeable, but I have been pretty silent on this platform.  The fact of the matter was the passion I had for this blog 4 years have diminished greatly.  It was no fault of WordPress or even of you all, my blog family, ultimately it dwindled to the absence of passion for life.  Have you ever been in something for so long, you didn’t realize that you no longer found joy in it?  That was the place I found myself in, stuck in this grind for success that I hit a brick wall of pros and cons to why I should continue in this race.

Everything I loved to do became a chore.  Reading became a burden as  I read 100s of pages for class, writing became a nightmare as I realized that my style didn’t add up to academia, singing became an obligation and reminder of imperfection, even serving the Father seemed like a weight that was too heavy to bear.  I lost myself in the day to day routine of trying to become something so that I can finally act on what I felt called to do.  Frankly, I got to the crossroads of my purpose and hated what I witnessed.  Then regret began to sink in: regrets for orchestrating my whole life toward a certain career, regrets for choosing a lifestyle void of an intimate relationship to abstain from distraction, regrets for choosing to do what’s honorable when wronged, regrets for making certain vows to the Lord, regrets for obeying what He has asked of me,  just a whole lot of regret for what seemed to be wasted time…

The concept of waste is a real one for me, for I have invested countless things and it seems like there was no return.  I wonder if there is anyone like me:  you’ve sacrificed time, energy, money into things and people and it seems like there was no return.  What a waste, right? Wrong.  Tonight I had to come to the reality that all that I’ve done was not in vain, that my pursuit of the hard thing over what was convenient and comfortable was indeed worth it! The Father has seen every stride towards purpose and to him, all my sacrifices were sufficient.

I believe that the moment we see our lives as a giant garden, filled with seeds of actions sown to better those around us – we’ll keep planting even in the hard times.  Seeds appear to be dead before they bloom, and what we sow now will reap us a harvest later.  All that we’ve experienced will reap a harvest in the season to come!  I am reminded of Jesus’ action of dying on the cross, his sacrifice is reaping the harvest of salvation even today.   Friends, if I can encourage you with anything- your hard work, your choice of what’s right, your pursuit of the Father, and your continuous love for people is worth every second.  In spite of what circumstances want to convince you of, may you be persuaded that a harvest is coming- a harvest of “success”, continual joy and fulfillment, and everything you need to change your world. May you be reminded that your good deeds are not in vain and may you continue in this race to the finished line.

My passion for life has been renewed, for the Giver of Life lifts me up and encourages me to remain in my pursuit. He reminds me of His faithfulness and nudges me with His goodness.  He speaks words of wisdom and comfort to combat my troubled heart, caressing away every fear.  In Him lies all joy and his truth reminds me that I am equipped to do all He’s placed in my hands.

Friends, I’ve battled so many relational issues in the past months, and I would love to share my thoughts with you.  I don’t know about each of you, but it seems like this painful place was designed to grow me in my pursuit of the Father- to teach me what to do and what not to do.  Seasons like these are not only critical but absolutely necessary to evolve.  It is the winter that seeds are sown, surviving the harsh weather in preparation for spring.  Life has been a giant winter season: dark, cold and slightly discouraging but spring is coming and because of that there is hope.

I look forward to sharing many things with each of you in the near distant future!

Until next time,

Simone

FIC: https://www.thespruce.com/how-deeply-should-seeds-be-planted-2539711

📷 Credit: Roger Spooner/The Image Bank/Getty Images

Creators Unite: 2018 is the Age of the Creative!

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers- 

As 2017 begins to wind down, and this year quickly comes to an end.  I don’t know about each of you but this year (for some) was one void of inspiration and creative flow.  I spoke with some of my other friends who are creatives, and they expressed a great disdain for this year in regards to their creative ability.  Again for some, 2017 was the year of the creative block.  Artists, writers, innovators, struggled to imagine again.  We saw this inward turmoil when we looked to the films released, the music heard and even the articles written about our favorite celebrity icons.  It was as if the creative breath of our nation, left with the new presidency and the hope of good, imaginative thought took a downward turn.  Don’t get me wrong this is not a political blog and the new year is not going to change that, but 2017 for a lack of better words : purely, ardently SUCKED!  It was a taxing year of tension between struggle and progression and society once again found skepticism in the intentions of good spoken by humanity.

This year alone, I wrote less than the year before.  I lacked inspiration, hope, time and ingenuity and frankly loss my love for the written art form.  The greatest tragedy is for a creator to lose the ability to create again. I bet those with one-hit wonders could identify with that statement, and too long for the day when they can create something new.  That is my heart’s desire to create something new, to be an endless stream of creative thoughts and ideas in my pursuit to demonstrate love to those around me.  The same old- same old, is BORING and  my attention span for what is lackluster has expired.  I want to create, and I want to create something legendary.  Even some of you, my friends, I watched you hit a glass ceiling with creativity as your posts began to be more prolonged and your woes more apparent.  I have great news… I believe that the year coming is the year for the creatives!  It’s going to be a year of renewed vision, more innovative ideas, and just a stream of creative output.  It’s the age of the Creative!

So… was that a diatribe against 2017?  I guess it was… though I am grateful for 2017, for God has been extremely good to me, it has been extremely hard filled with intense pain.  Yet, the pain I’ve experienced, did not kill me.  I’m here, I’m grateful and I’m ready!  I’m ready to hit the ground running, looking to unite as we create together.  Creators Unite!  For it is our time to shape and influence the world, and the works we set now will be admired for generations to come!

Thank you to each of you for believing in me!  I appreciate every comment, read post, shared post and I love each of you for it!

I believe in each of you.  I believe in your work, your writing, your heart’s desire for good and I wish you the best this coming year.  Are you a creator?  If so, this is your time!  

Much love,

Simone 

©Simone Holloway, 2017

#moreloveletters

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers- 

For many the holidays suck!  I think it’s a time when people truly realize the depth of their loneliness.  As a single woman, I am more aware of my singleness around the holidays.  I go home, sit with family and friends and see the stark contrast of my life from those I hold dear.  There are individuals all around the world that feel lonely, depressed and just icky around this holiday season!

About two years ago, I stumbled upon a website called More Love Letters- a movement that advocate for individuals to write love letters to strangers who are in need of a little love and encouragement to make it through life.  Organizations that are super intentional about sharing love and light make me smile, so I thought I would share that resource with each of you.  This holiday season, I am committing to writing love letters- so that I can bring some love to those that feel alone this season.  In fact, I would encourage you all to write some letters of encouragement and leave them at your favorite coffee shops, your go-to bakery and that restuarant you were dying to check out.  Spend a few days spreading love and light to those around you!

If you are interested in becoming more involved, or you would like to join me in writing these letters- check out: http://moreloveletters.squarespace.com ; or you can email me at authenticlove789@gmail.com and join me in this effort.  If you need a letter/ a pick me up of encouragement because life is a little hard right now, let me know and I’ll write you a letter.  You are so valued, cherished, loved and you should know that!

You matter.

Happy Writing!

Until next time,

Simone

FIC: http://s.newsweek.com/sites/www.newsweek.com/files/styles/feature/public/2014/07/22/725fe0205letters01.jpg

 

Survival of the Fittest- Law Student Edition

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers-

It’s so good to be back, happy summer 2k17!  I survived.  Yeppers, I truly survived the fire and the flood and the hardship of a first year law student.  It’s crazy to think about the essence of survival, fighting against all odds and making it out on the other side.  To say that this year taught me a lot about myself, is an understatement!  This school year was one of trial and tribulation, stretching and growth… I can truly say that I have grown as an individual.

There is something so fulfilling about survival…about making it through something that you envisioned taking you out.  How rewarding is it to overcome??? To conquer what was designed to conquer you? In this moment I am reminded of the words of Jesus,  “In this world you will have trouble, but take heart I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33) When I read these words all I see is: no matter what, you’ll survive!  To think that I can overcome anything is not only encouraging but empowering!  Defeat does not live in the land of the Overcomer.

So today, I seek to encourage each of you to rise out of the valley of defeat and to choose to overcome.  Don’t give up, don’t throw in the towel- survive and overcome that thing that seeks to overcome you!

Until next time,

Simone

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A Good Place

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers- 

It’s Thursday and I am absolutely exhausted! I think my body is trying to adapt to the mental demands that come with school at this level. I’m simply surviving with prayer, coffee, some Lecrae, and a few moments of sleep in the law library.  All in all, I believe that I am in a good place.  I just say that I was in a good place years ago, I wasn’t.  I did not know what a good place was until I found myself in divine purpose.  Yes, I deal with various giants and a slew of mountains but I’m a giant slayer and I tell my mountains to be removed.  Whether in the valley or on top of the mountain, I am in a good place.  This confidence does not come from perfection but rather from service to a perfect God.  He  has placed me into a good place regardless of the what appears to be, I am in a good place.

I’m reminded of one of my favorite scriptures in Psalms, Psalm 1: 3 in fact:

That person is like a tree planted by streams of water,
    which yields its fruit in season
and whose leaf does not wither—
    whatever they do prospers.

This scripture describes the one that willfully meditates on the Word of the Lord on a consistent basis.  Those who spend adequate time with the Lord, find themselves placed in a good place.  A place where there is constant spiritual prosperity, stability in daily living and favor with men.  The place I have found myself, though new and adjust-worthy, is a GOOD place.  I feel like I am in the perfect soil to grow and in a position of having amazing things grow with me.

Who would have thought moving to a new city, being surrounded by new people and engaging in a new program would be a good place?  But isn’t it like the wisdom of God to do things that do not make sense to yield the best results.  It’s the character of God to work outside of our comprehension to create His plans and purposes in our lives.

So friends, I just wanted to take a moment to encourage you.  I know life right now might not look good, and it may seem like good is never going to come- but hold on, good is coming.  In fact, I would argue that these circumstances is God’s way of bringing you to a good place.  I leave you with this,

For we know that all things work together for the good of those that love God and are called according to His purpose. (Romans 8:28)

Good is promised and it shall manifest in your life!  Welcome to your good place…

Until next time,

Simone.

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Best Foot Forward

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers- 

Today is  great day! Yeppers, it is a great day in the making…. I am so excited about these 24 hours allotted for today.  I am sitting in the law school lobby supposed to be studying but since I am ahead, I am not super stressed out about school work.  There is a beauty in living life with no worries and zero to none anxiety.  There is a simple beauty in trusting in God and living with joy.  So I decided to turn my music up, blog and enjoy this moment.

Today is one of those decision moments, when we can decide to place our best foot forward and live with purpose, or we can sit and complain about where we are.  Side-note: blogging during school hours? I call this… insane time-management(lol).  We have a choice as to how we will approach life- with joy or with worry. If I’m not going to enjoy what I am doing then it might as well not get done.  Sometimes we have to place our best foot forward and give life all that we have. Sometimes we have to give life our best shot.  Today is one of those times.  So I encourage you darlings, to give today the best effort that you can.  Enjoy life around you and smile a little more.

I got to go but I am praying for you guys and wishing you all the very best!

Until next time,

Simone

Pushing Through The Agony

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers-

Today so far has been a doozy from working a hr and half over my lunch to not getting things I needed done to feeling frustrated because I didn’t had the answers, today was just one of those days.  I’m having a I don’t feel positive day and it’s beginning to show on my face. So what do I do? I push past the agony of what is going around and me and lift up a praise towards heaven.

As soon as I got on my 3:34 lunch break I started to think about the goodness of God to the sunshine he provided to the ways we made- God is perpetually good and sometimes we have to push past the agony and pain to recognize his goodness.

Fam,  today I want to encourage you to push passed it. Push past the obstacles, push past the struggles, push past hardships and setbacks. You can do this, you can be successful, you can rise above this. Push pass the agony…

“The race is not given to the swift or to the strong but to he that endures until the end”

HAPPY VETERANS DAY!!!!!

Until next time,

Mo 🙂

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Have You Considered My Servant Simone?

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers-

Have you ever had a week that was like- “WHHHHYYYYYYY???” I think this week has been that one for me, a week from HADES.  It was this week that I got a law school rejection letter in the mail, that my sister got REALLY sick, I had an emotional breakdown and oh, did I mention that I got sick too but with just a cold. :/ …. and the week is not even over yet…. Anyways, these pass three days have been some trying times and I began to think about Job.  I had to chuckle, because I bet Job didn’t know that his life was going to radically change once Satan went before God and God made His suggestion.  “Have you considered my servant Job?” A question that would change Job’s life forever.

You know…we think being chosen by God exempts us from suffering, pain or any type of turmoil but what about trials of faith?  Those times that God allow bad things to happen to us to see if we truly love Him as much as we say we do.  Or what about those trials that God allow to prove to our Enemy that we are truly sold out to Him.  Maybe Satan and God was having an exchange and the Lord said :”My girl Simone, she loves me and she’ll live for me forever – no matter what you, Satan, throw her way…” So Satan said, “K, I’ll prove you wrong…” Hence my week of utter chaos, but the Lord was right!  I do love Him and no matter what comes or goes, I’ll always live for Him.  I believe that like Job all that I’ve lost, I’ll get double for it- that even this test of faith, in the end is worth it!

So maybe you feel like Job, a little overwhelmed by your trial of faith but I want to encourage you.  God loves you and He would never let you deal with anything you couldn’t handle and in the end, you’ll receive a reward of double for what you lost.  Hang on in there and continue to love God with all your heart.

Until next time,

Mo 🙂

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