I Am Too Proud To Beg

Hello old friends, new followers, and fellow bloggers- 

Happy Pre-Christmas Week!  I’m home for the holidays and I can feel the hustle and bustle of excitement in the air.  It’s been a while since we’ve talked, so I thought I would share something with each of you tonight.

As I began to gear up for dinner prep, I began to think about the holidays as a whole.  As many of you know, I ended a long-term relationship this past July.  Before this final break up, I was stuck in this on again- off again whirlwind of a relationship.  I spent seven years devoted to this rescue project, who did not acknowledge my own value to invest the same.  It was a living nightmare.  The sad part of this whole fiasco was every Christmas I would do the absolute most to convince him that I was “it.”  It was as if in my mind the magic of Christmas would cure our toxic relationship.  Slowly but surely, I awakened to myself, and now I am convinced that I deserve better.

Ladies and gents, this is the first Christmas in a long time that I am truly single.  I mean single-single.  I am single in my mind, heart, body, I belong to God and me alone.  Christmas is not my favorite holiday because of whose attached to me (contrary to Hallmark Channel’s popular belief), neither does this holiday bring me joy because of who is sitting at my dinner table.  Christmas is my favorite holiday because its the day God in goodness full of love gave the world a gift that was too good for it:  His Son.  He loved me enough to give me a piece of himself. And if the Creator gave himself so freely, why on earth should I have to beg someone to love me well?  I don’t.  Point, blank, periodt!

Friends, it took me seven years to learn that I deserved better.  Seven long, teary-eyed, exhausting years.  Now that I recognize my worth, I’m not begging anyone else to.  I know that I’m beautiful,  I know that I’m dope, I know that I’m wife material.  I understand that I am God’s gift to humanity, that I’ve been fashioned in gentleness and grace, that my class and elevated thinking is one to die for.  I know who I am.  And this awareness of me has shifted my whole approach to relationships.  Friends, know thyself!  Recognize the goodness that lies within you and refuse to beg anyone else to see what’s inside- especially someone with no vision, no goals, no ambition and a little to no future.

Be too proud of yourself to beg!

Xoxo,

Simone

Grace, Poise and Confidence

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers- 

Happy Friday!  I don’t have class today and I smile on the inside knowing that there is a God and He loves me dearly.  This week has been such a busy week and I cannot wait to get a free moment to sleep!

DISCLAIMER: I’m talking to the Ladies today!  Guys, you all are awesome but I’m speaking to my sisters, aunts, nieces, friends, and mentees about something missing from our world.  

Anyways…. I wanted to talk about something that is near and dear to my heart.  I am a big proponent of equality and ridding isms in our world, but I am also super concerned with this push to be a bad “B” rather than to be a lady filled with grace, class and poise.  We as women are powerful!  We are extremely powerful when we are filled with class, poise,grace, gentleness and strength.  I think because of the injustices, we have been taught that we have to assert our authority and become aggressive to be recognized which could be nothing further from the truth.  I love to see young women who carry themselves with class, not arrogance but a steady confidence in who they are and their ability.

My mom taught me to carry myself as a lady, she used to always tell me that when I entered into a room- my positive attitude and confident presence would speak for itself.  I did not have to show off my body for attention, I did not have to be the loudest person in the room, I did not have to esteem my own accomplishments and brag about my  abilities.  If I did a great job, those I impacted would speak my praises for themselves.  I used to think that she was just being super old fashioned and I spent time doing the complete opposite.  I came across as one who lacked self-worth, one who was super insecure and one who did not know the finesse of being the woman God created me to be.  This guy I was talking to said he wanted a girl that was just like a guy but with a different sex organ…ummm… I could never be that for him: because even though I was cool in conversation and extremely easy-going I was not a guy and I had no desire to become one.  There is something so amazing about living a life of class, respect and honor as a young woman.  This is not something that should be shunned or looked at as of days of old but something that should be adopted and revisited as a society.

Based upon experience, I’ve enjoyed my interactions with the guys around me by being who I am: a classy, gracious young woman.  It’s like my behavior, pulls out the gentlemen that are inside of them.  I experience more chivalry, more intimate conversations about life, and a supreme level of trust that came from an air of gentleness and security.  Our strength does not come from our aggression but rather from our gentleness.  I think God designed women the way he did to pull out the best in the men/world around them.  He made us powerful vehicles of life and he created within us this art of  cultivation and  beautification.  We make the world beautiful and we make the lives of our significant others beautiful with our words, mannerism and infectious attitudes.  It’s time that we uplift and build the rights of women around the world- by teaching each other that we are worth more than what we have been labeled.  We are not the property of men or society but we belong to a God who created us in grace to exude grace.

Former First Lady Michelle Obama is goals where it concerns grace, class and poise!

Until next time,

Simone

FIC: http://www.niamagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/First-Lady-Michelle-Obama-Opens-Up-to-Vogue_Nia-Magazine.jpg

Post-It Notes

Hello old friends, new followers and fellow bloggers- 

Whether you are a romantic or not, I believe that we all like to feel appreciated and loved.  I know that I do! I love to write and the one way I express love when I have a significant other is to write notes.  Small post-it notes.  I love the thought of a small sentence that express the simple phrase “I love you.”  I would write notes such as “You are amazing.”, “There’s nothing you can’t do.”, and “I’m so blessed to have you…” just to name a few.  I would imagine my boyfriend’s face, as he found these small gestures, these love-filled notes.

I’ve wasted time, writing notes to individuals who did not appreciate my gesture of love. I’ve wasted so much time, but I’ve learned that love is not something that should only be given if sought after in return.  Love is meant to be given no matter what.  So I learned and I loved.  We always want to do the most as Valentine’s Day approaches, we find ourselves falling into the big gestures that lack true mening, we spout off three words that have come to mean nothing without action behind it and we find ourselves empty once February 15 dawns upon us.  So today, instead of loving to be loved in return: just love!  Love with everything.  Love in the small things, love in the big things.  Utilize your love language and like me do what you enjoy most to bring a smile to that person’s face.

I still write post- it notes and I still imagine smiles and all in all- I love without strings attached; knowing that I could never go wrong by spreading the love of God.  I wish you all a lovely day and hopefully we’ll talk soon.

Until next time,

Mo 🙂

Featured Image Credit: https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/99/a0/18/99a0188c2d5fbfc7f011a18fc793f64a.jpg

July 31, 2011

Hello Authentic Lovers

“There’s tension from the start

A fire warms our hands

Anger warms your heart

I looked over

Saw something new

Brows bent, voice raised, & cursing lips

It was a different you

Rude, furious, & vile

You no longer laughed

You no longer smiled

The craziness of it all

How arguments start small

They spread like wildfire

Like the poison of a liar

A seed sown; I could not till

All apart of Satan’s will

To distract, confuse and create chaos

Your heart broken, your hope lost

I a w k w a r d l y watched

As a horn *BLARED* my cue

That night left me

with a different picture of you

I left you angry

I left you lost

If only I knew

My action’s cost

If I only knew…

I would have never left you.

(c) Simone Holloway, 2014

Today’s poetry tells the story of an onlooker witnessing an argument between someone they know and someone else.  Situations allow us to see individuals in a different light, but all in all- we are never to cast judgement: we are supposed to be there for people during hard times.  When we witness hearts being broken and self-esteems being lost, we are to be present and speak a word of hope.  That’s our role in the earth, to be bearers of hope.  I learned this lesson when it was too late- I pray that you don’t do the same!

Until next time,

Mo 🙂

Featured Image Credit:http://media.washtimes.com/media/community/viewpoint/entry/2013/11/06/bonefire2_s640x427.jpg?73b8e21685896c3f2859310aaa5adb253919b641